...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
