You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I love having hate sex.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
