It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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