considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
