Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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