I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
