i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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