Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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