just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
