if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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