Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
