I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
