Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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