# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
