i would punch a child for taco bell
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
two words...techno handjob
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
