thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
