The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Randomize
