Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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