I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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