i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
