He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize