they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
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