She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Found your dick twin last night
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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