I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
bring money and cleavage
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize