she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm both gender and math confused
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
