Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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