marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
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