she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize