PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
