We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize