CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Randomize
