idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
