Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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