look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
