You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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