Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
