: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
