the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Randomize
