Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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