Bisexual people are plain selfish.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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