its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
