After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize