But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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