For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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