Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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