Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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