where am i from again
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Sorry about my life...
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
