Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
