you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
