I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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