Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
50% drunk capacity currently
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
