? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
