Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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